Back in early 2014, I experienced a spiritual awakening of profound proportions. And as with many people's awakening, it took a full-on “dark night of the soul” to trigger it. But just because one is aware of their higher self and the bigger picture doesn't necessarily mean that real personal transformation is imminent. With the knowledge of the metaphysical nature of reality, existence, and self certainly comes great potential for personal transformation.  But that doesn't guarantee transformation, and if it does happen it often happens very slowly — which is what happened in my case. So without further ado, Here's my story of transformation.

The Pit of Despair

Artwork by Nejron  

As I just alluded to, my journey of transformation began when I hit rock bottom. About seven or eight years ago, I experienced a series of perceived failures in multiple spheres of my life. It involved a collapse of both my career and my relationships.  It was a double whammy of epic proportions which put me into a wild tailspin, and I crashed hard, so hard that I didn't want to get up.

 It was like a kill-shot to my psyche. I was utterly convinced of my incompetence and unworthiness. I was devastated and fell into a deep pit of despair, and I stayed there for quite a long time. As you might imagine, this state of mind had devastating effects on almost all aspects of my life. Think under-achiever, recluse, and poor man just for starters. I was about as far away from my most accomplished self, my most vibrant self, or best version of myself that I could be — and it sucked! But I didn't have the self-worth to be able to do anything about it.

 It's not that I haven't had any personal transformation since my awakening. I think I've transformed my way of being dramatically, and I believe that masters like Jesus and the Buddha would be proud of me. But it hasn't yet trickled up to more tangible signs of success and achievement in terms of creating my dream self and my dream life. And I assure you, we came here to live our dreams, not to play small!

Awakening to My Higher Self

In any case, my despair and gross under-achievement lingered on tenaciously for quite a while. But eventually, my first pivotal moment arrived, and something wonderful happened, I rediscovered my true self and the true nature of reality and existence. I experienced an amazing spiritual awakening that I will never forget, and it gave me the nudge I needed to started crawling out of my pit of despair and self-loathing. I could see and feel the first light of a new me, and it was exhilarating! It felt like I had been resurrected!

Caterpillar in the Cocoon

Slowly my confidence and sense of self-worth increased. But I still had so much emotional baggage to clear before I could shine. Even though I was spiritually “enlightened,” I was far from being personally empowered. I was still in avoidance mode, and I was playing very, very small. It was like I was a caterpillar in the cocoon, slowly gestating. And that gestation process would have to proceed at its own pace and come to completion before I'd have any real chance of significant personal transformation. Years went by in this phase. But thankfully, it now looks like the caterpillar is ready to break out of the cocoon.

The Butterfly Emerges

Just recently, I experienced a pivotal moment of great clarity. I finally decided to stop playing small and change my life in a big way.  I'm so ready to experience my highest potential, and I am so ready to become the best and most exhilarating version of myself.  I'm emerging from my cocoon, and I'm ready to soar!

Going forward, I intend to dream big and shoot for the stars. Two main parts of this are taking my spiritual writing and teaching to new heights and starting a freelance web design business. Two things I'm very passionate about.

When the Student is Ready

And here's the amusing part, an opportunity has just arrived out-of-the-blue that may help catapult me forward.  This event brings to mind the timeless pearl of wisdom by the ancient Chinese philosopher Loa Tzu — “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

In this case, a master teacher perfectly suited to help me attain both of my dreams has arrived. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Once you make a decision, the Universe conspires to make it happen.” So now I've got wind beneath my wings and I'm beginning to soar! Yeehaaa! Real transformation is about to begin!

Thanks to Universe.

All my love,